Fiction, Fantasy, or Reality

So my memories from this weekend are actually quite good. I was walking around thinking, "I'm almost there, Fin and I are doing really well." I remember doing AMAZING things with my dogs. Yes, the reality is that we didn't Q except for one course, but as I remember, it was only minor little things that prevented us from Q'ing. I love my memories. I smile when I think of the weekend. I tell my husband, "You should have been there! It was great!"

Reality Sucks.

The videos arrived today. My memory is not quite accurate. In many of Fins runs my handling is horrible. Tazzies runs are actually not bad. My handling has improved drastically for him. Fin, another story. I have to ask myself, "WHAT WAS I THINKING?"

Let's take the one class we Q'd in, Snooker. I remember that being fast and furious. Furious was right. I sent her often in the wrong direction. Sure I was able to bring her back and get the Q, but for goodness sake, my handling is NOT helping her.

Then there is her Masters Standard on Sunday, actually a nice run but..... It is my fault we didn't Q as I let her go early off the table. For goodness sake, I need my head examined. So not only did we not Q, but I let her break her start line stay... oh boy...

Although she placed 2nd in both her team standard and team gamble, when I watch the runs, I'm not real happy. I'm glad she and I have a light schedule coming into August. Lots of opportunities for practice.

Here is team standard. Ok, we didn't E and did get 2nd place, but geeze there are times I'm not sure where "I" was sending her due to late crosses, how is she supposed to know where to go.

Yes, yes, I know. She is speedy. Give myself a break.... well the hard truth is I have high goals and I will need to improve to get those. There are moments that I can see myself doing well, but I need to move and I'm standing still too much.

Am I totally depressed? No, not totally. I'll get there eventually. Sometimes being an optimist is good. Sometimes not video taping your runs and living in a fantasy is better.